Musings of an Afraid-To-Graduate Student

For some time now I have been in serious, albeit uncoordinated thought. I have turned to the compass of my word processor in a bid to find direction in the stormy mess that my thoughts have become - and this post is born out of that rush for direction. Forgive me if I come across as disjointed, but feelings like this grab hold of me once in a blue moon.

Service today was a Thanksgiving Service for the Graduating Class of 2010 from my campus fellowship, the Student Christian Movement, and as usual of such services was packed full of songs, celebration and testimonies. It came with mixed feelings for me, for a number of reasons (none of which was that I thought ill of any graduating student o!)

Ok, one of my best friends ever (who did a four year course) is graduating - seemingly leaving me behind. Also, a few other great friends I have made over the past four years are moving on. Yes, it is good to know that everybody is growing up and moving on with their lives, but I still cannot shake the feeling that I am going to miss them really bad!

Yes, and did I mention that (by God's grace) I belong to the Class of 2011 - the next set to graduate from the greatest of Nigerian Universities? Well, I do belong!!!

Well, at the moment the thought that I will (by God's grace) graduate next year does not particularly bring me plenty joy. Rather, it brings a heightened awareness of the amount of work that needs be done in that one year. See, the celebrations and testimonies today only served to drive home one reality - my time here will be up soon!

The largely peaceful and idyllic environment of the Obafemi Awolowo University campus has been a home of sorts to me over the past four years. Here I have made friends, learnt to give and serve, learnt to respect other peoples' opinions and perspectives, learnt to lead, the list could go on forever...

I consider who I have become over these past four years, then look back at the boy that walked haltingly into the Amphitheatre for the Matriculation Ceremony sometimes in November 2006 - and I can only wonder at how far I have come. Indeed, God has been faithful to me.

Yes, I have short-changed myself - and at times I have lived below my full potential. I have gotten great grades and bad ones. I have made money and lost even more. I have lent money out and I have lived in debt. I am not who I want to be - but I have come a long way from what I was.

Now, I am grateful that I chose to study a five year course. I am grateful that I have two semesters to right my wrongs, maximize my potential and raise the bar on myself. Beyond that, I am grateful that I have come to the awareness of how little time I have left at this time. I shudder to think what would happen if I became aware on the day of my own Thanksgiving Service - that simply would be disastrous!

Today, I will take the advice of Paul and I will seek to make the most of every opportunity that comes my way. Yes, I can be and do anything! I can leap over any wall, and run through a troop. Nothing is impossible for me - because I believe!

I believe I can fly... you can fly... WE CAN FLY!!!

I'll see you at the top; just make sure you fly as high as you can!

Peace.